Ups and downs

Lately it's been up and down. I've been so happy I could cry at times, and two minutes later I might be pissed off and down in the dumps. Quickly glancing at the things that have made me happy lately, I come up with my friends, my health, my ambition, and summer fun. There has been one bad apple hanging from the downer tree, and it has a dollar sign on it. I would have thought that at this point, 18 months into working, that I would be erasing debt, or at least breaking even. When I figure out this one thing I've never been great at, some fruit with a different fruit will grow, and I will be relieved. To me, there absolutely have to be shitty times to fully appreciate the good ones or even just the okay ones. I had my euphoric summer after college before finding this job, and when it's nothing but fun and games, I forgot it was fun and games and it was the only okay then.

In the meantime, I can tell myself to take care in the moment I'm actually in rather than worrying about something that will only take time to repair.