I think I kicked whatever was making me sleepy last week... one day after work I immediately crashed and woke up to another day of work, 12 hours of sleep. Don't know why. It got me a bit off my workout schedule, and that might have a little to do with it I suppose, but man, that sucked for a few days. So that's refreshing.
I
finally got my freakin' apartment clean. Things are shiny again, laundry is done, dishes are clean. Definitely refreshing.
While that sleepy/no energy thing is gone, allergies are here. It sucks. Claritin helps a little bit, but to have that, I would need to buy it, which leads me into the unrefreshing section of this post having to do with that root of all evil thing...
Last Monday began with having to run to the bank with all of my spare change to cover an overdraft that was almost inevitable.
Great way to start a week.
I won't go into detail, but I was in a horrible mood all of last week at work because of comments that had to do directly with this. I was a complete jerk, and it's carrying over into this week.
In St. Cloud this weekend, my fun time was very abruptly ended by something to do with this... long story short, a friend borrowed me money for an unexpected happening, said I could take a year if I needed, and now has been talking about how I should get a fast food job on the weekend instead of going out on the weekend to pay him back now. Ouch. I felt horribly guilty for being out on a Saturday night instantly, and then I saw him, and then we had a talk initiated by him when we had been drinking. Not ideal, but it got sorted out. It did hurt when he mentioned that he hopes this wouldn't end our friendship. Umm, in my mind, that thought would NEVER occur in this sort of instance, and I can't believe that got thrown on the table. And this is with someone that would be one of about three choices to be my best man at my wedding that might happen in about 2394098 years. So that sucked.
Then there's the part where I had to pay for Mother's Day stuff on my mother's borrowed dollar from a few days before so I could pay late bills and get my phone turned back on. Fucking embarrassing. I did what I could to make up for it by being a gardening slave for the afternoon while getting some sun and then cooking dinner. But I still felt sick about it.
And now I'm likely going up north with work next weekend, 75% of the reason being that it will make for a cheap weekend.
I hate being such a pessimist and bitching about money, but when it's negatively affecting everything I do, it's hard to shut up. I will never shut down my lifestyle to the point where I'm not happy, because at the end of the week, I need to unwind. If I don't, I go crazy.
I'm watching my ex-roommates who are younger than me fix up or buy their first houses and I'm wondering where the hell I've gone wrong, and what I need to do to make it right. I have nothing to get started up in poker again. At least I'm 75% done with bartending school. Maybe that will be the answer.
